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    The downside of online dating

    Not to mention the fact that we spend most of our time connecting through our phones on social apps like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat anyway.But, whether you’re taking a chance and trying an online dating site, or sticking to the old-fashioned dating game and looking for love in the real world, we’ve put together a list of some of the pros and cons to online dating to help you decide which way might help you find “the one.” If you’re afraid you’ll be made fun of for trying online dating, keep in mind that 40% of Americans have tried it too.Meaningful dating can be done at a distance, even in other countries.Relating thru writing (emailing) is a quick and efficient way to learn a lot about a person and how they tick, with minimum initial commitment or investment face-to-face and is the heart of effective online dating.That way, if you are dating someone who says they are serious, but you catch them viewing profiles, or sending emails, then you have enough proof to cut them loose. In the end, she found out that he was dating 5 women at the same time, and that he only said he would marry her because he wanted to keep her ‘on the line’ in case the main woman he was actively chasing left and he had to settle for her. As long as you are prepared to arrive at a date and see a different person, often about 10 years older than their picture, or be stood up, then you will be able to protect yourself emotionally. Do not let the ‘love’ chemicals cause you to rush into a bad relationship.One woman tells a story of a man who talked marriage at Christmas. She ‘lurked’ and watched him checking out profiles and sending IMs. Suzanne James has 10 years experience as an online life coach, using the telephone to facilitate her coaching strategy.

    One woman reported that she dated someone over the phone for a year.This approach can morph people into the commodities of others' consumption. Individuals can be intensely "in love" one minute, and not at all later, simply based on appearance. This approach goes against almost everything our body, mind and the Net convinces us is real.Often, people are in love with "being in love" not with you at all. It's good advice to ask for many photographs, so if physical attractiveness is important to you, a balanced look at someone over time and in many contexts is achieved. Don't project an illusion of a person from one image. The most pain, hurt, brokenness and distress caused online by people attempting to find the divine within each other, is a misunderstanding about the voracity of emotional online connection, and an abandonment of what true love really is.A "surfer" can immediately focus on people with similar interests, beliefs, age and other important criteria without having to spend time and money "going for coffee." Non-matching people can be sidestepped without ever needing to make contact.It's "partner shopping" in a global supermarket of humanity.

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